A lot of us struggle with low self esteem. Fortunately, there are changes we can make to improve our feelings about ourselves.
1. Identify your triggers
Think about the situations and conditions that impact your self esteem in a negative way. It could be stressful situations at work, a challenge with a spouse or changes in circumstances (such as moving to a new place or changes within a relationship).
2. Boost self-awareness
Once you identify your triggers, think about how you feel about them. Think about your thoughts toward those triggering situations, even if they’re negative. Then, ask yourself: are these thoughts really realistic? Would I say these things to a friend? And if the answer is no, then don’t say them to yourself.
Another helpful idea may be to spend some time journaling how you feel about the trigger. Sometimes getting our thoughts on paper helps us to better confront them.
Finally, remember your thoughts and feelings are valid. You aren’t wrong for thinking them.
3. Try to focus on the positives in the situation
I am really bad about measuring my self worth by how much I complete. For example, “I got everything done except for the ironing, so I have failed.” I’m also really bad about seeing only the negatives in a situation and forgetting to focus on the positives.
Another bad habit of mine is mistaking feelings for facts. For example, “I feel that I failed at this, so I must be a failure.” My solution here again is to journal what I’m thinking or feeling and then challenge myself to find the positives. I didn’t get everything done, but look at how much I did accomplish. Or, “maybe I didn’t do as well as I’d hoped, but I did better than before.”
4. Consider the outcomes
If something didn’t go as well as you’d planned, what would you do differently in the future? If something didn’t quite work out the way you’d hoped, what about it did go well?
There are also small things you can do to boost your self esteem. Some of my favorite things include the following:
5. Put together a favorite outfit
Put together an outfit that makes you feel beautiful and wear it often. You don’t even need a special occasion to wear it. Just put it on for instant confidence.
6. Focus on your talents
Make a list of all that is good about you. What do you do well? What are your talents? Everyone has an area where they shine- what is yours?
7. Surround yourself with the right people
People who really care about you want to see you successful and happy. If someone constantly puts you down and is always negative, you can choose to limit your time around them.
What are your favorite tips for increasing your self esteem?